JUST AS YOU BE 

No one to impress, no one to follow

This is me. Here. Alone with my thoughts and my mind. A bit of a writer today. I screamed. I ran from myself, my true self. Was it really too hard to imagine that I'd want something different. That I retreat back to my old ways...the ways of overeating and looking at those unmentionable things. Why do I do that to myself. I scream. That's not me. Like Superman when he became bad and he had to scream to separate himself from his bad self. Next is the fight. Well I'm fighting with words. These are my words. No I'm not depressed...I'm finding myself; who is my true self? It is I. I am a country fanatic, not really, but the music stimulates thoughts and the beat makes me continue typing. Yes. I don't care...this medium is a carefree medium. I will allow myself to make grammatical errors and mistakes. If I'm on a role I will just go through. I need to go through...I can't stay where I am right now. I need to jump to the next level. Like Mario, I need to defeat the dragon that is in the castle, the castle of my mind. I need to slay him or jump over him or under him and pull the bridge until he dies in the firey pit, where he attacks me. Well, and come to the next level, even if I'm not where I need to be (where the princess is), I'm no longer on that old level. I'm here, I'm now, I'm me. I'm on another level. I cannot stay where I was, I don't want to continue the cycles the keeps me locked in the castle. I am bigger than that. I am free from myself. I screamed, I cried out loud...I am beating up bad Superman and it feels good. Goodbye condemnation, goodbye overeating, goodbye thoughts of meaningless sex and men. Hello to a newness, a new me, a good me, a proud me, a level above. This is now, this is me, this is great! Hello me!